I am not Catholic, however you needn't be to acknowledge the inspiration that is Pope Francis. In a world so politically polarized and full of hate, the death of a man who preached love and acceptance is a loss for everyone. This post isn't really about the Pope himself, but rather a series of my own thoughts which he has influenced.
During my exchange, I've stayed with a Catholic host family, which, coming from a non-religious family and having never attended Mass, I was nervous for. I wasn't quite sure if the church would come to have an influence in my daily life. In America, I live in a small town in Tennessee, with baptism being the prepotent denomination. The baptists are by no means renounced for their forward thinking or ability to accept those who are different from them, and thus my relationship with the Christians has been a complicated one. I know it's not fair to group all Christians together based on one sect, but after several occasions of being told I was going to hell and was living in sin because I was dating a girl, it becomes difficult to not be slightly bitter.
The hypocrisy is what really bothered me. The ability to judge others on a different basis than that which one judges oneself on is a seemingly redundant pattern across Christians, or at least some of them. It's ironic, because the original teachings of Jesus were to forgive and love everyone. He helped and loved those in need, even if they didn't necessarily "deserve" it. How incongruous it is then, that the people who claim to worship and follow him are now condemning people for being in love. Even going so far as deporting other humans, who are in search of a better life, back to their struggles because they don't have the right paperwork. Jesus would have never condoned such actions. Hence comes my problems with these Christians; they are not true Christians. I am not against the teachings of Christianity, but rather the frequent misinterpretation of them to be used to defend hate instead of love.
Look at me, on a soapbox; the only reason I'm posting such thoughts is due to my full confidence that no one will ever read this blog. The truth is, I'm running out of pages in my journal, and I don't have enough room in my suitcase to bring home another. I am a pretty private person, but it's 2025; I had to cave to social convention and embarrass myself on the internet at some point. With my luck, 20 years from now, I'll convert and try to be a Baptist preacher, and someone will find this post and out the true agnostic liberal in my soul. I suppose that's better than being discovered a pedophile, like so many others. Oh boy. Maybe this should stay in my drafts.
Anyway, it's not that I ever hated the Christians; I was simply aware to not share certain aspects of my life to the people with WWJD bracelets. I find it humorous when people who wear such bracelets do things that Jesus would, in fact, not do. But who's to say? If he lived at all, it was 2,000 years ago. Who am I to claim knowledge about what he would and wouldn't do? Maybe he would be deporting children to El Salvador. I say this, of course, to not sound arrogant. We all know what Jesus would say on that matter.
Now I shall get to my relevation. Since being in Germany, I have a lot more time to think rather than to speak, as, although my German is better, it is by no means perfect. I never really thought much about Church beforehand. I didn't quite understand why people went. To me, the difference between right and wrong and good and bad seemed so obvious. Did people really need to talk about this every week? Obviously, this was ignorance born from never actually attending a church service. During my exchange, I have attended Mass with my host family, and it is actually quite lovely. Even as someone who is not Catholic, I can enjoy it. I figure no one in the room is actually worshipping the exact same way, we all have our own image of God; it's just a time of day where we can all come together and acknowledge a force greater than ourselves. A place to talk about things that we all share, and a place to remind us to approach our issues with a patient and kind heart. How wonderful is that? What a lovely way to start the week.
The issues I mentioned before about Christians, aren't really about Christians. There are mean, close minded people in this world, no matter what they believe in. If there were no Christians, there would still be homophobia and racism. Some people might use their religion to defend their stance, but if they couldn't do that, they would find something else to back it. Humans, including myself, like to put people in boxes to make them easier to explain. As I travel and meet more people, this becomes more difficult as I realize that no one really does fit into the boxes I make in my head. There are good Christians; there are bad Christians. The same goes for any other religious group. The more I learn, the less I can explain; funny how that works, right?
The first time I ever felt God, or a Greater Being, was in a tour of a Holocaust imprisonment camp. Ironic, I know. That place was awful. There are really no words for the terrors committed there. I cried when going through the museum and almost vomited when we were in the execution rooms. You could smell the death still lingering there. Not only could I smell it, I could feel a physical weight on my shoulders. The weight of so many thousands of brutally murdered humans. That's how I realized that humans must have some sort of spirit or soul. If we didn't, and death was purely a scientific act of our hearts ceasing to beat, I don't believe that it would linger like it did, like it does. I can't explain how any Higher Power, who has any control, could allow this atrocity to happen, but I can say that humans are more than just flesh and bone.
Pope Francis once said that different religions are like different languages, different paths to the same God. I find that religion is a very personal aspect of our lives, and should never affect anyone but ourselves and our own relationships.
Not that anyone asked, but those are my thoughts, or some of them at least. I'll probably change my mind in a few years. That's the beauty of growing up.
On the off chance that someone actually does read this, and is offended by anything I wrote, please remember that I'm just a girl.
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